Aside from the directly biological, I've never given much credence to the notion of nature over nurture, but the more I think about it, I realize that maybe because I was so much a product of desire, as opposed to love, my psyche has had no choice but to follow suit, which is not to say that I have not loved because I have certainly loved intensely, but merely highlights, I guess, the tendency of the desire I have to push others away superseding the need to love.
Part of me, the part I tend to label the more sensible, believes that I should feel justified in this impulse, reasons that all of this hullabaloo about keeping one's enemies closer is precisely that. It seems to me that I should employ a defense mechanism, even though I recognize it for what it is, because don't we all need defenses?
I don't know how I feel about this.
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